Preparing for the Sewol Ferry Seminar
1. On April 16, 2014, at 10 a.m., the Seoul sky was obscured by a haze—whether fog or fine dust, I couldn't tell. Looking out the window of the subway on Line 2 on my way to school, I thought, "It looks like Gotham City." Looking back now, that thought of it resembling Gotham City was like a foreshadowing of the 'incident' that occurred that day. Gotham is the city where Batman operates. It's a (fictional) city where psychopathic villains like the Joker, whom everyone knows, appear, and where other big-time criminals like the mafia and yakuza run rampant. And the main reason it became such a hellhole was the absence of a social safety net and the corruption of public officials and police. Still, the silver lining was the existence of the Dark Knight, Batman. Batman protects Gotham City every night. That's right. There was a hero there, Batman, who was both wealthy and possessed an incredible sense of justice. Back to my memory of April 2014. On April 17th, I sat in front of the television. On the screen, a large ship finally tilted and sank beneath the water, while the reporter covering it broadcast only silence. Since that time, the truth has remained silent. They didn't try to uncover the cause; they kept hiding something. So that fight was futile, and there was no hero like Batman.
2.
I wanted to see the facts as they were.
3.
This was my first social shock.
4.
It pains me to speak of the events of April 2014. This pain stems from knowing I ultimately did nothing, and that I will never be able to do anything. This pain originates from my own shame.
5. What happens when everyone gives up because they feel powerless?
6.
Every time I ride the subway, I wonder: What if a major accident kills everyone inside? What if no one comes to rescue us?
7.
I expected The Admiral: Roaring Currents and Pirates to underperform. But as if to mock that prediction, Myeongnyang shattered all records with 17 million viewers, becoming the highest-grossing film ever. The Battle of Myeongnyang took place in the Manggol Strait. The Sewol ferry also sank in the Manggol Strait. Four months have passed, yet our compassion vanished like a noon shadow.
8.
While writing the April Sewol Ferry seminar proposal, my head feels like it might explode from overthinking. Setting aside all the detailed accounts, if I were to state only the 'intent' of this seminar, it is to approach a certain 'truth'. For us, who have been unable to see the Sewol Ferry clearly, either swept up in emotion or consumed by pity, what we need most now is a modicum of shame to accept the truth. It is about accepting the truth and feeling that long, lingering shame within myself.
9.
And so the media remained silent. No effort to approach the truth was visible. Instead, they fed us sensational stories. The president's tears, Yoo Byung-eun's death, slandering the bereaved families. They made us hear the horrific narrative that the Sewol ferry had been talked about enough. No heroes emerged in South Korea.
10.
So, discovering the truth demanded an immense effort. Except for those who invested that effort, most citizens couldn't even afford the luxury of knowing the truth. They were too exhausted. Still, they teared up and grieved when they thought of the Sewol. Poet Jin Eun-young once said: Our compassion is as short as a noon shadow, and our shame is as long as a midnight shadow. That was true. Our compassion for the Sewol ferry vanished quickly. Only those who felt shame remained to fight until the end.
11.
April 2015. It was the day when those who had forgotten gathered together with those who remembered every single day. That day, I participated in a flash mob at Suyu Station, then walked with picket signs to Mia Station before taking the subway to Gwanghwamun. I had no grand ambitions. I simply intended to commemorate the first anniversary, lay flowers, and go home. The path to lay flowers felt endlessly long. No matter how far we walked, the end was nowhere in sight. The procession was long, and police stood blocking it. They sprayed water cannons and pepper spray, while plainclothes officers directed us down blocked paths. I tried yelling a few curses at the group of police blocking my way, but quickly backed down. Then, crunching on ice from a Coke bought at Subway, I boarded the subway home. Chrysanthemums still clutched in my hand.
12.
April 2016 approaches. In April 2014, when the Sewol ferry sank, I instinctively thought this place was like Gotham. In April 2015, I turned back without much resistance when a group of police blocked my path. And now, April 2016 is here again. What on earth am I supposed to do?